Brain Drain

It's jello
Stirred with spork
Catching some
Leaving most
Without insulation
It's gonna melt
Leak out of the ears
Evaporate
Become grains
Of pretty sugary gems
For the ants
To cart away
Joyfully
Re-purposed.

Dink Dink

Digging down
Into my self
Until the shovel
Hits the top of
My soul
Dink dink
Yes
I've reached it
But
It's platinum
Let me in!!

Simple Request

Don't get invited
Into my heart
And start ripping
Down the curtains
Hammering at the walls
Spitting on the floor
Then blame me
For leaving
The door unlocked.

Garden

You are slipping away
But not forever
Underground
Your children
Future generations
Breathers
Givers of air
Stew like soup
Waiting for the flame
To cook them up
Serving the world
Once again
With color
Brilliant vibrancy
Feast for the eyes
Delight for the soul.

Desire

I wish I were mist
Slipping under you door
Moving along your skin
Breathed into your body
Feeding your soul
Becoming a part
Of your very flesh.

Rotund Beast

You there
Smug Jabba girl
In your head
You are sooo
Ten years ago
Svelt confident taut
Ass bouncing quarters
Pixie tits
Slender upright Amazon
Yet today
You slouch deeply
Belly begetting more belly
Jelly jelly everywhere
Shadow cast descendent shadows
Bloated ship
Pulling into harbor
Assisted by a team of struggling tuggers
Bellowing horn grunting
Arriving at port to portly oinkiness
People scream
"You're blocking the sun!!"
Maddened and hungered
You scoop up multitudes
Of skinny younguns
Crunching their bones
(Sweet ignorant marrow)
Lapping up their indescretion
Smashing every mirror
Kicking ripples of reflective tides
In your head
You remember what exercise was
How good it felt
To burn away time and last meals
It was not labor
But luxury
To which you secretly yearn
To return.

Advice to Men

Generate a fragrant lather
Soak your balls in the frothiness
Rinse before it burns you
Do not use too much deodorant
Especially the kind that coagulates
Like snowball ornaments
It's distracting
No matter how good you smell
When a woman touches you
Touch her back
Don't wait for her to walk away
In order to respond
It's too late by then
Don't simply use mouthwash
Gargle and loosen the throat oats
Floss and do it well
Remove the history
Of past meals and deeds
Clear your eye snots
Pluck wayward nose and ear hairs
Trim those nails
If you're going to get intimate
Wash those salty hands
Clamflesh needs no extra salt
It'll burn otherwise
Figure that one out yourselves
Call her back
Soon after a deflowering
Even if you think things went well
Nurture that orchid
Or it will die
Things are nice
But actions are far better
Especially if they are pleasantly naughty
Yet clean in all crevices.

Mercy Them

In sorrow
One cannot see
Beyond the tainted glass
Cannot see the flowers
Breaking forth
From the slumber
Of the winter.

Mercy the sorrowful
Those whose hearts ache
Beyond healing
Mercy their pain
Send them light
From the soul
Beckoning them forth
In the spirit of Love.

Heart

This fleshy, muscly mass
Beating in my chest
Pumping globules
Of my existence
Persistent
Definition of body
Meeting soul
The transfer
Distribution
Of life-giving
Scarlet
At times I wish
It were not so absorbent
So paralyzed
By sadness or grief
Yet times
When it is freed
From its cage
I feel almost a fear
In the elation
From the beauty
The joy of life
That it may just
Break free from me
And fly out into
The universe
From which
It was borne.

Limb

Gotta missing limb
This extension of Me
Tingling sensation
Of a presence
So near and distant
Touch no longer
Able to feel
So near and distant
So very near
So very distant...

Eff Bird

Following the shadow
Of the bird
Unbeknown
Its ass opens
Indiscriminate
Liquid and seeds
Spurt out below
Onto my car
Creating a spatter
Of waste
Upon blueberry paint.

Jr. High

I am sorry
I cannot tell you
Who you are
Only who I see you
Acting as
Purporting to be
Smarter greener
Holier than me
Yearning to be unique
Which is not altogether hard
You must simply
Be yourself
Not an effigy
Of gigantic
Ridiculous proportions
Marching yourself
Through a protest parade
Shouting mispronounced epithets
Rehearsed to death
In order to show
That you are "educated".

When I Hear Your Name

My heart stops
It pauses
Afraid to lose
This precious moment
Of recognition
In reflection
Of its own
Existence
It is almost
As if
We are the only
Ones to ever
Have existed
So my heart
Must continue
Its work
To move toward
Being with you
Once again.

Spanish Blackberries

You laughed to see
Such an abundance
Of blackberries
On endless branches.

Tanned tropical arm
Reaching into clusters
Delicate clasp and pull
Of graceful
Joyful fingers
Under Spanish
Countryside sun.

You live there
Forever Mother
Dearest Mother.

Cicada

A creature crawled out of me
Called Me
I was once one thing
And became another
Growing, growing
Until there was no room
For the old me
And I broke open myself
Flying far away
Screeching high into
The world.

Insomniac

I don't have a choice
My eyes peeled back like orange rind
My brains squished and runny
Sweet, frenetic thoughts
Randomly going somewhere
And nowhere
All at the same time.

Reminescence, Sorrow, Light

Mother
First love of mine
The one who showed me
The light of my own heart
In four days
You will die again
My sorrow will awaken
Remembering your hands
Like mine
Given to me by you
My eyes shall remember
Every line of your face
This heart remembers you
Never to forget
That though my sorrow
Knows no end
My love for you transcends
Eternity.

The Moon

Biggest bird in the night sky
That which commands the tides
The precious making of children...

Oh My Love, My Child

To love you
Is to suffer
Immeasurably
Delightfully.

For every whine
For every tear
There are thousands
Of coos
Toothless smiles
Jumping jack enthusiasms
Gifted by
Time.

It is not very detached
Not very Buddhist of me
To reach so deep
Into the ground
To intertwine my roots
With the fruits
Of my womb
So I am Mother first
Learner second
Utmost seeker.

Children
Know Me as the One
Who loved you eternal
Forgive me my
Human-ness
Do not see me as
Goddess.
See me for who I am...
Imperfection.

Passion

Seeing you
Is like an explosion
Of a million stars
In my brain
My soul shines
Pristine
Every dermal cell
Aflame
Yearning toward
Air
That will burn higher
My want of you
Already inexplicable
And wild.

It's Never Over

There's a part of me
That shall never heal
It is the part
Aching so much
I could turn inside out
From the pain
Were it so that
I could wash clean
The memory of you
I would never
As it is implausible
For Love is Deep
For Love is Pain
It can be so terribly
Beautiful
Like your hands
Which at one time
Held my face
Your eyes
Looking into my eyes
Giving me that Love
Which defies words
Dearest Mother.

Shhh

My mouth casts a great big shadow
Full of secrets
It hangs over the precipice
Of a new reality.

5

I remember when you cut your hair
It was almost 3 feet long
Then you became a pixie
Tossing your head around
No jail of hair
He wanted it long
Too bad, jerk.

Simplicity

Someone once said
Poets give stars to the mundane
But in what is considered
The everyday monotony
I see great beauty
In every corner
Through every mist
The tones of voice
The dull aches
Simple sighs
The mundane gives stars
To the poet
They marry
So that beauty
Is born.

Untitled

Life
Beautiful
Cruel
Glorious
Terrible
Here
Gone
Time
Healing
Crushing
Intense
Simple

Among the Stars

I'll never touch your face again
Nor you mine
But out there
In the ether
Pieces of us
Jagged and smooth
Will always be intertwined.

Ultimate Betrayal

To usurp
A child's innocence
In the most terrible way
Crushing trust
Self pride
Physical invasion
Is the most
Vile
Contemptible
Inexcusable
Violation
Of
Humanness.

Woe are the ones
Perpetrating this horror
For whatever Gods
Non-Gods
Beyond God
In which you do or do not believe
There will be no mercy
In retribution.

Taker

You purport to feel
Alienated
Take Take Take
Rarely giving
Your sharp tongue
Cutting
Usurping
Slobbering
Between fangs
Gleeful in misery
Of others
Gloat
Bleating goat
If it is not praise
You are deaf
Oblivious of
Rueful decadence
Eliciting disgust
From all around.

Purple

mother
your color
purple
dignified
noble
queen's
blood

Rocks

To be stuck
Between
Paradise
Gratitude
For that which
Always seemed
Implausible
And
Terrible agony
Regret
To be still
In mourning
For those
Long gone
Is a very
Difficult
Existence
Indeed.

Child

When I was little
There were such storms
Over Miami
Paper trees shredded
Palms cut open
Split right down the middle
Catfish flopping around
Gasping on the draining streets
Just as soon as destruction
Burst forth from the ocean landscape
Out back it went
Steaming off the asphalt
Coconuts peeking through grasses
Beheaded from bodies.

Cold Season

Warrior mother
You saved me
Simultaneously
Breaking my heart
Tearing me open
Like a bag of candy
All the pieces
Scattering falling
Into the sewer
Carried into
The future
Delicate sweets
Tainted by
The past.

Cheese

To love you
Like I do
Is to become
YOU
On my thighs
little pockets
under my chin
grows the beginning
Of yet another chin
Cheese Cheese
You are evil
Such delightful
Dairy goodness
I love you
I hate you
We are One.

One Wish

Everyone
Should have someone to love them
No matter what they have done
No matter who they are inside
Everyone
Should be valued by someone.

Snow

Muffling ugliness
Great equalizer
Of flaked water
Majestic simplicity
Downing power lines
Cornering people
Into supplication
Warmth seeking
Bodies together
Cardinals sneak
Nibbles of seed
High branches
Heavy laden
With weather
Lose limbs
In slight wind
Cascading onto
Earth below
The streets
Crunchy soft
Alternating
The light bright
Contrasting blizzards
Of yesterday.

Christmas Mama

It's Christmas
Though you were Buddhist
You wanted the day
To be special for us
So in my hands
This time of year
You are there
Helping me provide
For my own little family
You are in the whisk
Turning over my intentions
Of love into cookies
I light candles
Remembering your eyes
Hint of smile in them
Every now and again
I saw you happy
It's true
So true
Love at every turn
I miss you.

Letter from the Universe

Dear Friend,

Do you know that I am always with you? I don't need to shout the mind out or be loud to let you know I love you. Past the frosted window, my candle is always lit in love for you. Here I sit near the flame, smiling and chanting my mantra for best wishes surrounding you. For each and all, I am in the smallest place with big presence. I am confident and persistent for you.

Love always,

*

Untitled

Leave behind any illusion
Of a perfect world
When we grow up
The magic does not disappear
It manifests into hard work
To ooch toward
A more real world
Which in and of itself
Might be called
Some kind of perfection
Unattainable.

Girl Poet

A girl might be better than a poem
Even more beautiful than all flowers
But a girl who is a poet
Might even be more gorgeous than
All of those other things.
A girl poet sees the sun
Not just as a light for the world
But the bringer of life itself
She sees the sun as a sister
From whose belly bursts forth a garden
Of life.

Love

Dear baby
I am on the other side of your door
I can hear the turmoil
Of exhaustion
Coursing through you
Bellowing from the chasm
Desiring sleep
You didn't want me to coax you
With my arms
You fretted sitting up
Pushing me away
You wanted no comfort
I imparted my love words
Placed you lovingly down
It kills me to hear you call out
So I go back in
You still will not have me
You still will not lay down
I go back out
You scream louder
Dear baby
I am on the other side of your door.

The Cheese Poem

I weaken wherever cheese appears

So weak for the cheese

So gay for the cheese

Oh, cheese, pretty cheese

My best friend, Cheese.

Memories Darken the Corners of my Mind

Hearing my father
Key holder
To my Mother's gatekeeper
Of life
Beat her
On Christmas morning
Such young vivre
In my solar plexus
Bereft of light
Deprived of oxygen
Killed parts of a child
This seedling choked
Such a little helpless person
Why did Mother cry for us
Why did she beseech me
And brother for help
That she knew we could not give?
Why did she mark us
Make us guilty party
To father's destruction?
In desperation
My love more succinct
My disappointment
My terror
All equal
Bigger than all of us
Fractured ghosts.

Trauma

Trauma
It breaks you like glass
It pulls your joints
Out
Trauma
Uses your own arms
To beat you
Into nothing.

Only One

I will only write
One poem about you
Not for you
You were supposed
To be my father figure
You cultivated
This little girl
Into your little wife
Fitting that
As you lay bleeding
To death
On neighbor's step
Once more
Your eyes opened
To look upon my face
After mother
Acted as
Judge jury executioner
Issuing a fast track ticket
For you
To hell.

Eyes

I have spent an inordinate amount of time
Staring into your blue eyes
Trying to know what you might have known
Seeing what you were seeing
I have spent an inordinate amount of time
Hoping that you looked into mine
And saw how much love was behind them
For you
Always.

Be at peace. Be at peace...

Pervasive

I dug through
the garden today
To try to find you
I sifted through
Each clod of dirt
calling out your name
But you are only dust
such infinitesimal specks
I tried to find you
again and again
Gently crumbling
the clods with the sun
Shining through from
behind and into my face
But you are not here
you are not anywhere
You are everywhere.

Dare

I dare you to try to step to this
My eyes are sharp
My words are swords
Swift sight
Deep wounds
But
I am on a path of peace
I try to rid myself
Of weapons
Yet
My soul is a magnet
For strength
Sometimes having to wield
My eagle eyes
My ninja skills
To defend myself
And my tribe.

Your Demise

Dear Doughnut
I am going to eat
The hell out of you today
I cannot hear you scream
But even if I could
I would still tear
Your ass apart
And drown you
In this here coffee.

Nether Place

If we are all made of stars
I am ready to go
Back home
This place
This Earth
With all its beauty
Surely can be nice
But I long
To be back in the stars
Where my mother has gone
Where they have all gone
Free from the anchors
Of feeling
Of restlessness
Of sorrow
Of sadness
I long
For space
Ethereal freedom
From consciousness
From pain
From joy
From the unpredictable
From the predictable
From myself.

Healing Arms

Oh my baby
My sweet son
Fevering
Laid up
In my arms
Close to my heart
We keep each other
Alive and well.

Shh Shh

From one eye
Into the other
I see deeply reflected
What I want from you
I know
I KNOW
I see you seeing the same
In my eyes too
I suppress the urge
To let loose
My joy
My rightful giggle
I know you
You know me
Yet here we are
With no words
Only unspoken deeds
Between us.

Mental

It is not an illness
Only an over-amplification
Of awesome
Gone awry
The very people
Who appreciate it
Often times
Judge the harshest.

Ticky Tacky

Like a fly on sticky paper
You struggle against
The obvious
You're going to die
Poop eater.

Skip Skip Skip

Everyone marvels
At the flat rock
When it
Skip skip skips
Across the water
But no one thinks
About the rock
As it sinks beneath
The glass surface
Further from
Sunlight
To the bottom
Of the lake.

Whatever

Say what you like
Do what you want
But if it's yourself
You hate
Stop pointing
The flamethrower
At other people.

Lif(v)e(s)

You're mad at me
Because of something
We cannot achieve
Together
Don't be angry
I believe
In reincarnation
I'm coming back
For you
If given a choice.

Set Adrift on Ocean Madness

Yes
That bitch is crazy
And lovely
And all that
You know
You love her.

Suburban Night

We'd be lesbian lovers
Were we not so bound
By what we have
In pseudo-straight suburbia
Yet what we do
Is take trips to Wegman's
Squeezing fresh fruits
Before plopping them
Into our baskets

Easy

You are too easy
To figure out
So transparent
It's me I can't seem
To unlock.

Gratitude

Be grateful
(occasionally)
for suffering
it is the
perspective bringer.

Implausible

How can it be
That one
So full of wonder
Should feel
Such hollowness
Inside?

Riding Midnight

Heat hugs onto every curve
Wheels tilt at every turn
We are parallel to the river
Geese honk
Turtles startle and splash
Tight ass in front of me
Rhythmic pumping pedals
Leading the way
She turns to laugh
The humidity creates a haze
Around her aura
A halo of my dreams.

Dream State

I beg you not to come again
Dreams dribble out
A bucket of honey
With stingers flecked
In the light
So sweet
So painful
Amber memories
Spatter the walls
Of this brain
Abject beauty
Incredible horror
Opening my eyes
The day dawns
Sweet taste upon
My dreadful tongue.

Illusory

Perfection
It comes in
Impeccably wrapped
Shiny boxes
Little tiny cubes
Filled with nothing
But illusion.

Today's Headline: Brain Drain

It's jello
Stirred with spork
Catching some
Leaving most
Without insulation
It's gonna melt
Leak out of the ears
Evaporate
Become grains
Of pretty sugary gems
For the ants
To cart away
Joyfully
Re-purposed.